Tuesday, May 20, 2008

And The Winner Is...

Barak Obama. Clearly. There is little room for doubt that Barak Obama will win the Democratic nomination for this years American general election. And it sucks.

Don't get me wrong. I love Barak Obama. I LOVE Barak Obama. I have since I heard him make the keynote address at the Democratic national convention two years ago. He's a rock star. He's sincere. And as much as this is becoming a cliche, I really do believe that he is looking to bring about real change in the political, economic and social landscapes of his country. I have no doubt that in many ways, he would be an amazing leader, and a much needed breath of fresh air in the White House.

But with Barak Obama as President (or as the Democratic nominee, but let's not even get into what will happen if John McCain manages to pull a rabbit out of a hat on this one), it means that Hillary Clinton won't be. And that's what sucks. Because despite the whole "I-got-shot-at-but-maybe-I-didn't-quite-get-shot-at-in-Bosnia" incident, she's amazing. She is smart, sharp and cultured. She has been groomed for this role since Billy Boy was playing I'll Touch Yours If You'll Touch Mine in the Oval Office. She is the only woman I can think of in my lifetime so far, who could really be the President of the United States. For her to lose at this stage is really upsetting for me. Because, yes, it is important to me that a woman be President of the United States. I really do believe that her gender (along with her politics and her spirit) would make a huge impact, not just for the country, but for women everywhere. Again, so cliche. But true.

I said over a year ago that the next Democratic ticket should have been Hillary Clinton - President, Barak Obama - Vice President. If Hillary had won the nomination it is pretty much a certainty that she would have asked Barak Obama to be her VP. And he would have said yes. That was a done deal. I also said a year ago that if Barak Obama were to win nomination, he would ask John Edwards to be his running mate. And with Edwards' endorsement of Obama a couple of weeks ago, I think that one's pretty much in the bag. I can't say for sure that I think Obama won't ask Clinton to run with him, but I wouldn't bet on it. He doesn't need her the way she would need him. I'm sure he would look at her not just as a distraction, but as a competitor. Billy Boy tagging along everywhere certainly wouldn't help.

But here's the thing - can Barak Obama really win? Are we overestimating the multiculturlism and inclusiveness that we believe the United States to be? Or are we overlooking historical, deep-rooted racism that is sure to rear its ugly head as soon as a black, son of a Muslim man, steps up to the plate? How many more times are the Republican pundits going to slip their tongues and call him Barak Osama? How many more times are they going to flash that picture of him with his head wrapped and tell us that, despite all factual evidence to the contrary, he really is a Muslim? And we know what that means - Muslim=Al Quaeda=Osama Bin Laden=shit getting blown up all over the place. So, I'll ask again - as much as we want him to, and as much as we want change, as much as we want to believe we're better than that - would we really vote this black man into the office of the President?

I'm not so sure. I wish I could say YES YES YES, but I'm not sure.

Thursday, May 15, 2008

Turning the page

First, I need to put this out there: The purpose of this blog was never intended to be a place where I throw up all the baggage of my personal life. This blog was supposed to be where I write about literature, politics, spirituality, and all of the other things that fill my life, not about the holes that need filling in the first place. Though I will admit - putting it all out there has been cathartic.

Anyway, it's not that the emotional vomit won't continue after today, but I would like to make a concerted effort to bring more into this forum than what has been here for the past couple of months. But I'll start that another day.

For today, I need to get out there another cathartic experience I had. This one has been a long time coming. Over a year. And in situations like this, that is a loooong time. I didn't mean for it to happen, and I never expected it to happen, not on this day, with this person, but it did. And it was great. Here's why:

I knew that this for me would be an emotional experience. It wasn't just about getting it over with and moving on. I was so scared that I would cry, that I continued to postpone it. That, plus, I really hadn't spent time with anyone who was worth the time and effort this would take.

But then...I have this friend. And he's the lovliest person you'll ever know. He's kind and good and trustworthy. He's honest and sincere and full of integrity. I trust him completely. And a week ago, when we were spending some time together and a tender moment turned into a passionate moment, I let it happen. I told him what it meant to me, and he couldn't have handled it better. And now that's one more chapter in my old life I can close the book on, and one more chapter in my new life I can open the page to. It doesn't matter what happens in the future - I wouldn't have changed this for the world. It was worth waiting for.

Friday, May 9, 2008


This was posted on the blog of a great, dear, friend of mine. It was something told to her by the husband of a good friend. And it's so true, it was worth repeating here. It's worth repeating over and over and over again.

Sing it loud ladies.

“Men are LAZY. They will only treat you well enough to keep you. The reason I treat my wife so well is because if I didn't, she'd be GONE IN 60 SECONDS. The reason she'd be gone is because she KNOWS she's worth it, and DEMANDS that level of respect. The reason men walk all over Paprika is because she doesn't like herself enough to believe that she deserves better. She SAYS that she loves herself and she's confident, but if that were true, she wouldn't spend so much time worrying about "What does THIS mean? What does THAT mean? What does it mean when he does THIS?" You want to know the correct answer to those questions? WHO CARES? Even if you're going to lie awake at night worrying about how your relationship is going, trust me, HE'S NOT. You talk about what you WANT (I want him to want to spend time, call, think about me, whatever). If what you want has to come from someone else, you're never going to be happy.”

Sing it loud.