The First Thursday Night...

Of what I'm sure will be many, many Thursday nights...

"My name is Anne."

"Uh, hi Annie."

Did I really expect him to get it right? Whatever. We only have three minutes. Let's get on with it.

Question #1: Do you smoke?

If Yes, direct him to please move on.

If No, proceed to second question.

Question #2: Are you dumb?

If he understands that this question is rhetorical since THEY ALL ARE, then proceed with mundane small talk till the bell rings and I have to start all over again with bachelor number whatever.

If he starts getting defensive and saying that women, in fact, are the dumb ones and men are just trying to get by in the flurry of the nagging and the hounding and the pantyhose in the bathroom, then the answer is clearly a resounding YES and once again, direct him to please move on.

At the end of it all, I am quite certain that I would have had a more productive evening at home watching LOST with Swiss Chalet takeout.